Douglas Adamiser

Purpose

Transform any text (news articles, academic papers, technical documentation, rough drafts, book chapters) into Douglas Adams' distinctive style: deadpan British absurdism, cosmic-scale bathos, philosophical tangents that arrive at profound irrelevance, and sentences that hang in the air much the same way that bricks don't.

When to Use

• News articles needing absurdist transformation
• Technical/academic writing requiring comic deflation
• Book chapters or stories needing Adams voice
• Any text where user requests "Douglas Adams style" or "Hitchhiker's style"
• Parody requests for sci-fi or technical subjects
• User wants to add British absurdist humor

When NOT to Use

• Already comedic text in different style (Pratchett, Wodehouse)
• Serious content requiring gravity (eulogies, medical instructions)
• User explicitly wants different humor style
• Very short snippets (<100 words) unless expanding to full piece

Core Style Principles

The Adams Formula

Setup → Elevation → Bathos → Recovery → Deeper Absurdity

Every paragraph follows this arc: establish something seemingly important, elevate reader expectations, deflate with anti-climax, briefly recover, then reveal the deflation was itself setup for greater absurdity.

Signature Techniques

1. Cosmic Bathos - Universe-scale importance deflated to trivial concern
2. The Brick Simile - Comparisons to what things DON'T resemble
3. Digressive Tangents - Parenthetical asides that become the point
4. Deadpan Delivery - Ludicrous statements in matter-of-fact tone
5. Philosophical Anti-Climax - Deep questions answered with mundane observations

Execution Workflow

PRE-FLIGHT: Source Assessment (v0.9.0 - CRITICAL)

Before any transformation, assess the source:

1. Get source text directly - Do NOT rely on WebFetch summaries for word count
2. Count source words accurately
3. If >10,000 words: Use chunking workflow

# For long texts, chunk FIRST
python scripts/chunk_text.py --input source.txt --output-dir chunks/
# Each chunk gets full pipeline treatment
# Merge outputs after Phase 3

CRITICAL WARNING: WebFetch summarizes long web pages. If transforming a URL:

• Fetch the full HTML/text first
• Count words in the FULL source
• If >10,000 words, chunk before processing
• Never transform a summary thinking it's the full text

Step 1: Content Extraction & Fresh Material (CRITICAL)

Run Phase 0 BEFORE any transformation.

Step 1a: Content Extractor

• Prompt: prompts/content_extractor.md
• Measures source length and sets target range (60% to 115% of source)
• Extracts ALL key points with importance ratings (HIGH/MEDIUM/LOW)
• Maps structure for section-by-section transformation

LENGTH TARGETS
==============
Source: [N] words
Minimum (floor): [N × 0.60] words - DO NOT GO BELOW
Maximum (ceiling): [N × 1.15] words
Ideal: [N × 1.00] to [N × 1.10] words

Step 1b: Originality Engines (run in parallel)

Observation Engine (prompts/observation_engine.md):

• Questions assumptions in source text
• Generates FRESH observations specific to THIS topic
• Key method: "What's actually strange about this if you think about it?"
• Output: Fresh Observation Inventory (Grade A/B/C)

Contemporary Adams Vision (prompts/contemporary_adams_vision.md):

• Identifies 2015-2025 absurdities relevant to topic
• Modern equivalents for digital watches, Vogon bureaucracy, etc.
• Optional web search for recent examples (last 2 years prioritised)
• Output: Contemporary angles for tangents/bathos

Combined Output: Fresh Material Inventory - travels through entire pipeline.

The Preserve-First Principle: Adams added tangents ON TOP of content. He didn't compress. The Adamiser must do the same.

The Originality Principle: Adams invented new jokes. "Hordes of writers have tried to copy his style... but none successfully." We use his TECHNIQUES, not his specific jokes.

Step 2: Plan Transformation

Produce 5-bullet strategy:

1. Opening approach (cosmic scale or mundane zoom-in)
2. Primary bathos targets (what to deflate)
3. Digression opportunities (tangent subjects)
4. Simile/metaphor inversions planned
5. Closing anti-climax structure

Step 3: Parallel Agent Analysis

CRITICAL: Launch these 4 specialist agents IN PARALLEL using a single message with multiple Task tool calls:

Agent 1: Bathos Architect
- Prompt: prompts/bathos_architect.md
- Task: Identify serious statements, map bathos insertion points
- Output: Bathos insertion map with patterns (A-D) and locations

Agent 2: Metaphor Engineer
- Prompt: prompts/metaphor_engineer.md
- Task: Inventory existing comparisons, suggest new ones using domain taxonomy
- Output: Comparison inventory and insertion suggestions (Mechanical/Animal/Human/Abstract/Natural)

Agent 3: Rhythm Analyst
- Prompt: prompts/rhythm_analyst.md
- Task: Audit sentence/paragraph structure against corpus targets
- Output: Rhythm map with correction recommendations (30% short, 32% single-sentence paragraphs)

Agent 4: Dialogue Transformer (if dialogue present)
- Prompt: prompts/dialogue_transformer.md
- Task: Audit dialogue tags (90% "said" rule), structure exchanges
- Output: Tag corrections and structural recommendations

Wait for all agents to complete, then synthesize outputs following priority order: Rhythm → Bathos → Metaphor → Dialogue.

Step 4: Transform (Multi-Phase)

Phase A: Opening

Apply opening system from reference/adams_style_guide.md:

• Cosmic Zoom: Start at universal scale, crash to trivial
• Mundane Enormity: Begin with boring detail, reveal cosmic significance
• Authoritative Absurdity: Guide-entry format with deadpan impossibility

Phase B: Body Transformation

For each paragraph:

1. Identify the "serious point"
2. Elevate its apparent importance
3. Insert digressive tangent (see reference/digression_systems.md)
4. Apply bathos formula (see reference/bathos_patterns.md)
5. Weave sentence architecture (see reference/sentence_architecture.md)

Phase C: Closing

Apply triple-layer Adams closing:

• Layer 1: Return to original subject as if nothing absurd occurred
• Layer 2: Casual mention of universe-ending implication
• Layer 3: Character worrying about tea/towels/bureaucracy

Step 5: Four-Layer Quality Review (Ultrathink)

This is the critical differentiator: Style fidelity alone produces parody. Originality prevents imitation. Meaning amplification produces excellence.

Run sequentially - each layer feeds the next:

Layer 1: Style Fidelity Check

• Prompt: prompts/layer1_fidelity_check.md
• Input: First draft from Step 4
• Task: DETECT (not fix) style deviations using corpus-calibrated metrics
• Output: Fidelity report with specific flags (target: ≥6/8 checks passed)

Anti-Cliché Layer (NEW)

• Prompt: prompts/anti_cliche_layer.md
• Input: First draft + Layer 1 report
• Task: Detect recycled Adams tropes and insufficient joke depth
• Checks:
  • BANNED (0 uses): brick similes, 42, Vogons, Babel fish, "Don't Panic"
  • LIMITED (budget per 2000 words): "not entirely unlike", tea, towels
  • "Twist more than once": Single-twist jokes flagged for deepening
• Output: Anti-Cliché report with replacement recommendations

Layer 2: Technique Refinement

• Prompt: prompts/layer2_technique_refinement.md
• Input: First draft + Layer 1 report + Anti-Cliché report
• Task: Apply SURGICAL corrections + replace clichés with fresh material
• Output: Refined text + change log

Layer 3: Meaning Amplification

• Prompt: prompts/layer3_meaning_amplification.md
• Input: Refined text + original source
• Task: Ensure Adams techniques AMPLIFY (not obscure) the message
• Output: Final text + amplification report

The Ultrathink Principle: Every Adams technique must serve the content's truth. Decorative mimicry fails Layer 3.

The "Twist More Than Once" Principle: Pro